How to Contact Us

Best is to contact us by email at 
We prefer email because we can answer it at our leisure and we can file your inquiries in any of dozens of neat little electronic folders organized by topic, subtopic, etc. It's also easier to read an email than trying to decipher the post-it note that we scrawled on with one hand while holding the phone to our ear with the other.  Email also helps with our record-keeping in case we ever get subpoened by Homeland Security. 
If you insist on human contact, you can reach us by telephone at 916.803.2495. 
Fax is 866.340.8229. 
Our Snail-Mail address is
Burns Bizarre
5960 So. Land Park Drive #408
Sacramento, CA 95822
United States